So it's the end of summer, and I'm realizing that I have a shitload of pictures to upload and write about because my lazy ass has been laying on the roofdeck working on my tan every weekend or jetting off to Greece for three weeks instead of keeping up with this blog like I hoped to when I first had the misguided idea to chronicle my celebrity stalking exploits in the big city, before it turned into the mess it is right now. Oh well, at least I'm tan. Without further ado, here's the super abbreviated catch up version of this blog, just in time for the new fall season (and TV stars making appearances to promote the new fall season)! Buckle up kids.
Jeremy Piven leaving Sirius radio, nowhere near as douchey as I expected him to be even if he is dressed like the kid in the
Open Your Heart video. (I miss
Entourage!)
Olivier Martinez, whose death on
Revenge (pushed into an airplane propeller!) I clapped for since I couldn't understand a motherfucking thing he said on the show with that thick French accent. Oh, and he cheated on Kylie Minogue while she had cancer and is married to crazy Halle Berry. For now.
Speaking of
Revenge, season four premieres Sunday September 28th (two days before my birthday for anyone who was wondering. Read: no one.) Super sexy Nick Weschler was in town to promote AIDS Walk New York and couldn't have been any cooler!
Roseanne, still batshit crazy and everything I hoped she would be, taking a photo with me and then refusing everyone else waiting!
A constipated looking Mike Myers rolling the window down at a stoplight to sign an autograph and give a thumbs up. No clue who the twink is with him.
Bobcat Goldthwait, still alive and completely unrecognizable at Sirius to promote God only knows what.
American Idol reject Chris Daughtry performing at Fox & Friend's All-American Summer Concert Series, proving that the folks at Fox are just out of of touch with music as they are with politics.
Richie Sambora fucked Cher, Heather Locklear, Denise Richards and the fans, refusing to sign autographs or take photos when he arrived at the
Today Show
while Dan Aykroyd, star of such films as
Crossroads,
Yogi Bear and
Intern Academy (remember
Intern Academy? Me neither.) blew us all off the same day. Sure he also starred in
The Blues Brothers,
Ghostbusters,
Trading Places and
Doctor Detroit, but he's still an asshole!
Nelsan Ellis tore it up, playing drug dealing looker, hooker and cooker Lafayette on
True Blood for seven seasons. Did I mention Lafayette was also a medium who was possessed by a slave seeking vengeance for the murder of her
baby back in Olden Times, and then murders his boyfriend after being possessed by the spirit of a dead witch? Oh
True Blood, I'm gonna miss you!
Ariana Grande looking like a toddler Charo hooker while singlehandedly causing a hair extension shortage on the east coast. Her brother Frankie is just as awful.
Dee Snider performing at Fox & Friends All-American Summer Concert Series because Fox & Friends
really has their finger on the pulse of America. They're also a block from my office.
Or how about super hot
future Academy Award winner Vin Diesel in Times Square to promote his latest piece of shit? Seriously, if he's not naked in the film a tape recorder in a mannequin could do his job.
Will.i.Am promoting something that wasn't the next Black Eyed Peas album and is therefore irrelevant in my world.
Dame Helen Mirren at the premiere of
The Hundred Foot Journey, refusing to sign blank pages because she didn't know what photos would be printed on them. Does she have some nudes floating around somewhere or something?
James Cameron taking time off of making
Avatar 2 to talk about the Titanic. Again.
Tyson Beckford promoting the Kiehl's LifeRide at Macy's Herald Square. This man is so hot he could promote Satanism and I'd buy it!
We're almost done, I swear!
George Takei making the rounds to promote his new documentary
To Be Takei. I was never a
Star Trek fan, but his contributions to
The Howard Stern Show are hysterical, and it was really cool to meet him even if he was a bit abrupt with fans.
The Beach Boys performing at Fox & Friends All-American Summer Concert Series. Did I mention that they have free BBQ, which draws a line of homeless people around the block?
Emmanuelle Chriqui promoting something that isn't the
Entourage movie. God I loved that show!
Rita Ora arriving at Fox & Friends to
get some free BBQ promote her new perfume, because who doesn't want to smell like the juice that comes out of the mustard bottle if you forget to shake it first?
Pierce Brosnan arriving at Rockefeller Center, reminding me why he was cast as James Bond in the first place.
Not Apollonia 6. Not Vanity 6. Not even Carmen Electra. It's 3rd Eye Girl, Prince's latest girl group attempt. I took this shot as insurance in case they make it big. They won't.
Why are you even still reading this? God you are patient and kind! Happy Labor Day. Now go get some BBQ. But not at Fox & Friends.
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