What Happens in Vegas...?

Stranger things have happened, but on Friday night in Vegas I found myself in the ten table lounge of an off-the-strip Italian restaurant enjoying the musical stylings of national treasure and underrated jewel of pure glamour Pia Zadora.  The star of such instant classics as Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and the trashy incest drama Butterfly, for which her husband bought her she won a Golden Globe, Pia managed to hit most of the notes while looking like a cabbage patch doll run through the spin cycle a few times.  The food was great and I'm so glad we made reservations.  Yes, we made reservations.  I know.