I was eleven years old the first time I saw Bo Derek's breasts, and it traumatized me. It was during some wholesome family bonding time with my parents and brother during a
Clash of the Titans/A Change of Seasons double feature at the drive in theater. Though they'd never heard of
A Change of Seasons, it starred Shirley MacLaine and Anthony Hopkins, so my parents reasoned it
must be good, and they were damned sure going to get their moneys worth! I will never forget the shocked expression on my mother's face when Bo Derek is getting fucked HARD in the hot tub, her breasts heaving up and down in the worst case of overacting during a sex scene in a body of water until
Showgirls came along fourteen years later. My brother and I just giggled in the back seat. AWKWARD!
Bo went on to star in such underrated cinematic jewels as
10,
Bolero, Tarzan the Ape Man, and
Ghosts Can't Do It, and now she's set to guest star (as Tara Reid's mother!) in
Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!, premiering on the SyFy Channel Wednesday night. It's amazing the career path a nice pair of tits will get you.
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