Gary Busey - Crazier than a mechanical dog

For the last three seasons, one of my guilty pleasures in life has been The Celebrity Apprentice.  Famous people lying, cheating and backstabbing each other in the name of charity for Donald Trump's amusement...what's not to love?  And the best part of this season has been weirdo force-of-nature Gary Busey, who's brand of bat shit crazy includes voicing random acronyms ("FART: feeling a rectal transmission") and questionably brilliant but mostly insane Buseyisms such as "Your imagination is the hood ornament on the car of creativity" while generally scaring the shit out of his teammates with his unrestrained enthusiasm.  So I had mixed feelings when he was fired from the show on Sunday and had to leave the comfort of the stained La-Z-Boy in his TV room to do press for the show.

First stop, Sirius studios.  I'm not sure what show, or shows, he was on, but it felt like we waited for eoooooons. I should have thought to bring a few granola bars for sustenance, a sleeping bag, a copy of War & Peace, a catheter and a shot of adrenaline to wake me up for the last couple of minutes.  When he finally came out, disheveled and slightly bemused by the world, the publicist tried to rush him to the car before he could share his sparkly lunatic dust with the crowd, and I managed to snap a quick shot.

The weekly Celebrity Apprentice press conference at Trump Tower the next day, which I only just found out about dammit, was a little more controlled.  A step and repeat was set up, and Extra was there as Donald Trump gushed about what a terrific guy Gary is and what a great job he did on the show and how he raised a lot of money for his charity, which is the same fill in the blank monologue he uses every week when all he really cares about is how the show does in the ratings, while Gary stood by looking slightly sedated and barely able to keep from drooling on himself.  The camera turned to Gary, who flashed a smile so big he nearly blinded the lady next to me with those jumbo chiclet teeth and let forth with a trail mix of poetry so beautiful it should be knitted on your meemaw's pillows.

Observations:  Donald Trump's cotton candy hair and Cheeto complexion are unnerving in person and the Celebrity Apprentice ratings will probably drop this week now that Gary Busey is getting a hug from a straight jacket.  But thanks for the pictures kids!